Self-Compassion Summer
Being a therapist, you do the work that asks you to hold space for the storms of other people’s experiences while learning to notice your own. With changing seasons, I am noticing the content of what clients bring to sessions might also shift. With the sun starting to shine a little brighter, birds sounding chirpier, trees blooming livelier and winds feeling warmer, there is an unsaid suitcase of expectations that summers bring. With the push to optimize every sunny weekend, and the subtle urge to compare our vacations to curated social media feeds, the season of relaxation can quickly become a season of relentless self-criticism.
When people hear the term self-compassion, their minds might immediately jump to monumental acts of self-care. While that might be helpful at times, self-compassion is rarely rooted in grand gestures and usually thrives in small, consistent acts of kindness. Instead of striving for an unattainable ideal, self-compassion invites us to treat ourselves with the same warmth, understanding, and grace we would offer a close friend. This is an evidence-based psychological practice that actively rewires our resilience and well-being.
During sessions, I often share with clients that compassion starts with naming, “This is hard!!” I’ll say aloud and invite them to repeat it until the defensiveness softens. Naming doesn’t fix everything, but it gives the nervous system a moment to rest and our mind the permission to be imperfect. I encourage clients to engage in small but tangible acts outside of sessions: reducing screen time, walking at the lake, grooving to the beat of your favorite songs, a warm shower, or sitting with a glass of a refreshing beverage.
Privately, I practice mindfulness in similar ways. On busy afternoons, I might take a 3-minute walk in the interim of two sessions, a quick snack, a breath where I drop my shoulders and unclench my jaw or sometimes just shut my eyes for 5 minutes. These seemingly simple yet profoundly repairing rituals are just a few ways to include acts of self-compassion more consistently.
Research shows that self-compassion engages the parasympathetic nervous system, allowing you to actually rest and recharge. So this summer, when the impulse to criticize yourself arises, let go of the need for seasonal perfection, and step into the much more rewarding practice of being a true, fierce friend to yourself.
Saakshi (she/her) is a staff therapist at AACG. Drawing from EFT, CBT, ACT, and Solution-Focused, she works with individuals and couples experiencing anxiety, depression, ADHD, relationship concerns, life transitions, and identity development. As an international therapist trained in both the United States and India, Saakshi brings a rich multicultural perspective and offers therapy in English, Hindi, and Marathi, with a limited proficiency in Gujarati. Saakshi can be reached at: saakshi@amandaatkinschicago.com
